When I fry my eggs in a skillet, I make sure to crack my eggs in a glass over the sink, so that none of the egg drips down onto the cooking surface of the stove. When Nathan cooks his eggs, he just cracks them on the edge of the pan, and inevitably some drips down on the glass top, and burns onto the freshly cleaned surface. When I cook my eggs, I melt a tab of butter in the skillet so the eggs do not stick (regardless of non-stick skillets, they still stick). Nathan on the other hand refuses to use butter (not because of health reasons), but because he just doesn't. From the picture above, you can see the skillets yesterday as we cooked side by side eggs in the kitchen. The one on the left appears to be the before picture, and the one on the right, in my interpretation, is the non-stick pan that Nathan absolutely destroyed and annihilated. However, the one on the left is exactly how the pan looked after I cooked my eggs with butter.
It would be easy to surmise that I am trying to make a statement about my son being lazy and not using butter in the skillet, cracking his eggs over the sink in a glass, or even cleaning his skillet after he destroyed it. However, that is not what this blog is about. It is about there being 2 different ways to get to the same result. In many cases, there might be several different ways. To Nathan, the eggs taste just as good to him, as mine do. He might even think that he is being more efficient than me by cutting out the extra steps of butter or cracking the eggs over the sink. Maybe in Nathan's mind he is thinking that saving those extra two steps at the beginning, can be used on the back end taking extra time to clean the skillet (except I am usually the one cleaning them). I am not sure, because I am right brained and my way tends to be the correct way, or is it? Everybody in their right mind can see that the left skillet is less maintenance, but maybe that doesn't matter to Nathan like it does to me.
The sole purpose of this writing is to talk about what you get bent about. There was a time that I would fume and rant and rave over Nathan messing up my pan. He would leave a mess on the counter (as most 21 year olds do) and I would get upset over the mess that I would have to clean up. He simply doesn't see anything wrong with the pan. Maybe, just maybe I am the one with the wrong perspective.
I was talking with one of my employees today about a negative comment a customer left her. After reviewing both sides, I realized that the customer was just really bent about life, and it had absolutely nothing to do with the work my employee did for them. As I drive down the road, I am amazed at how many people get bent with road rage. I was bent just last week at a major food chain while waiting in line for an hour and a half to pick up my moms pre-ordered groceries. I wanted to publicly blast them for their error, but what good would that accomplish? It wouldn't take long for us to write out a list of things that we get bent over, or that we see people around us exercising frustration and rage. Again, to what purpose does this serve?
I am asking, because I too need to hear the answer. I get bent out of shape when my wife leaves the back door open for the dogs to run in and out of the house, when it is 92 degrees out and the air conditioning is running. I know she wants to give the dogs free reign to be able to go in the back yard to go to the bathroom. Why do things bother me so much? I believe it is human nature to want things just the way we want them. Selfishness enters into pretty much everything we do in life. Don't mistake "self-care" for selfishness. Self-care is the ability to take care of ones self. Sometimes I just need an evening to myself. Or maybe you indulge in your favorite ice cream. It could be seeking therapy for something you are having trouble getting past or through. Either way, self-care is the act of making sure ones batteries are charged and not drained. Selfishness on the flip side, is only being concerned about oneself, and disregarding the needs of others. I always try to put others needs above mine, but I know I fall short on a daily basis. By putting others needs in front of yours, that inevitably means that you are going to have to do some things that you don't prefer or even enjoy. Why should you do this? Well, you don't have to. However, selfishness is one of the main things wrong in this world. If you are only looking out for numero uno, then it gets to be a pretty lonely place with a lot of hatred towards our fellow man.
In summation, the challenge I would lay out to each one of us is what is making you bent quite too frequently, and how can you change that? Stress will reduce years off of your life. In addition, what can you do to help a fellow pilgrim on this path we call life, to not get so twisted up in knots? There is no right or wrong answer to these questions, and it might take some pondering. So even though I think that my way to cook eggs is better and easier than Nathan's, does it really matter in the grand scope of things? He is getting fed, and I am getting fed. So what if I have to buy a new skillet earlier than expected, at least my son wouldn't have to hear me nag at him constantly about how my way is better. May we all strive to get bent a little less, and instead show some love to our fellow neighbor.
As always, comments are appreciated, either on this website, or on my Facebook page.